Today, Obama declared a National State of Emergency. I wonder if people are aware that the next step is martial law in the U.S. It feels like in one of those apocalyptic movies: every order and law seems to break down around me. But people I ask about it don’t even know nor care because they are busy worrying about paying the bills and not getting evicted. Driving through LA I see posters advertising “Wolverine” with huge muscles and an angry face, Superhero fantasies for increasingly impotent, helpless and overwhelmed men. A smaller poster announces a women’s conference to discuss environmental concerns.
Sometimes I wonder if we’re just dealing with an adolescent boys’ culture here and the nightmare will soon be over — While the male part of our society wastes away on a diet of violent and far-fetched fantasies of invincibility, women build new alliances. This country needs new men. Precious few have heard the call and give me hope. Woman need a different male than a buffed-up retard with blow-dried hair. (I actually don’t know a single woman who finds Wolverine appealing). Still, we are being fed this crappy diet of old male icons – by the men who run Hollywood. The new male in my mind incorporates something broken and frail. He mirrors the pain and confusion men experience right now. Men with bulging muscles seem pointless, almost ridiculous in a time of far superior technological power available to both sexes.
Regarding the male need for testosterone-drenched fantasies: It has already been demonstrated where these fantasies lead to: Reckless destruction and vanity-driven displays of superiority, never mind who pays the bill. Am I actually waiting for an admittance of guilt – even an apology? Keep dreaming. Instead of retreating in shame, most men today still insist on unquestioned leadership and totally miss the boat. Yes, it will be ugly. Remember Nazi Germany? An entire population of big-mouthed alpha males on their knees, in total defeat – a humiliating experience. Still, a necessary one that laid the groundwork for new growth and values. Today, Germany is lead by a woman chancellor and the country enjoys a level of gender equality American women can only dream of.
The American male is in free fall and desperate to hide it. Women now need to be generous healers, not gloating divas who’ve “known it all along”. And what about our needs for the strong shoulder to lean on? As always when men have left to war, we flog to each other, the never-failing women’s support system, to make it out of the male-induced chaos. As small, green shoots of new gender relationships faintly sprout, we are about to experience the last, desperate stand of a dying breed: the male dominance model is not going out without a fight. Last refuge: Fascism. One last attempt of the John Wayne dinosaurs to stay in charge. Can this transition ever be smooth? Lonely times for women and men both. Beyond gender dominance we will find each other again.
